Putin Dog Walks Trump

The Deal That Wasn't

The Art of the Deal? Hardly!

Trump, ever the self-proclaimed dealmaker, thought he'd pulled off another "beautiful" agreement.

Our intrepid president, armed with his signature blend of bluster and naivety, proudly announced a partial ceasefire with Putin on March 18, 2025. Spoiler alert: It didn't go as planned.

A Ceasefire in Name Only

Putin, demonstrating his usual respect for international agreements, didn't even wait for the ink to dry before resuming his favorite pastime: turning Ukrainian infrastructure into rubble.

Trump's "tremendous" negotiation skills proved about as effective as using a sieve to bail out the Titanic.

Bombs Away: Putin's Idea of a "Partial" Ceasefire

Russian forces, apparently confused about the definition of "ceasefire," decided that it meant "fire everything we've got."

Ukrainian power plants, water facilities, and communication networks found themselves on the receiving end of Putin's unique interpretation of peace.

Shock and Awe (But Mostly Just Shock)

Ukrainians were overwhelmed as Russian forces launched overnight bombings that devastated critical infrastructure and residential areas.

The psychological toll of these relentless assaults has been immense, with civilians struggling to cope with the destruction of their homes and the constant threat of further violence.

Putin's Power Play: The Art of Making Trump Wait

In a move that would make even the most patient diplomat twitch, Putin decided to turn his phone call with Trump to negotiate the partial ceasefire into a masterclass in passive-aggressive time management.

While Trump cooled his heels in the Oval Office, Putin was busy entertaining Russia's business elite, smirking and shrugging off reminders about his "important" call.

The Kremlin Shuffle

Putin, ever the multitasker, managed to mock Trump, keep his oligarchs happy, and redefine the concept of "fashionably late" all in one go.

Trump, left twiddling his thumbs for over an hour, got a firsthand lesson in who really holds the power in this relationship.

Trump's Deafening Silence

Our former commander-in-chief, usually quick to blast his thoughts across the digital landscape, found himself uncharacteristically quiet on Truth Social.

No all-caps rants, no "BAD HOMBRE" accusations, just the sound of crickets and the faint echo of Putin's laughter.

The Art of Saving Face, Not!

Trump's spin doctors, working overtime to polish this diplomatic turd, found themselves with a Herculean task.

How do you spin getting stood up on the international stage? Apparently, the answer is: you don't.

The absence of Trump's usual bravado spoke volumes about the magnitude of this diplomatic disaster.

The International Community's Collective Facepalm

World leaders, watching this debacle unfold, collectively reached for the aspirin. The UN Security Council, while not convening any special sessions with dramatic titles, expressed concern over the escalating situation. Meanwhile, NATO officials, though refraining from public dances, reiterated their warnings about the dangers of trusting Putin.

Conclusion: The More Things Change...

Putin's latest escapade serves as a reminder that some things never change. Trusting him with a ceasefire is like expecting a fox to guard a henhouse – it might work for a minute, but you'll end up with feathers everywhere and a very smug fox.

Trump, meanwhile, has added another chapter to his book of "The Best Deals, Believe Me."

This latest entry, filed under "Oops, I Did It Again," showcases his unique talent for snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

As Ukraine picks up the pieces (literally), the world is left wondering: Who's really holding the leash in this relationship?

One thing's for sure – in the game of international diplomacy, Putin just showed Trump who's the real alpha dog.

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